Thursday, August 27, 2009

So Sad

Nobodys on Blogspot anymore. Right Jordan

Thursday, July 2, 2009

LA- Life Altering

so i've been in LA for three weeks...

actually before i begin, i havent been on blogspot for what two months. so i gave up on 6 sides lol. the other three though will be secret. maybe i can write about them later.

anyway ive been in LA...

wait one more other thing. i heard a lot of people have switched over to Tumblr? haha. should i switch?

anyway LA. I changed my hair, bought new clothes, and i changed my attitude about where im going. not going to explain but these past three weeks have been the best three weeks i could ask for this summer. sorry Searider kids.i had more fun and spent more money.

i build blocks in LA:]

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Six Sides of the Block-Side 3

hola! i think i wrote that in everyone's yearbook i signed. so before i begin let me clarify this blog. a lot of people have been asking what this blog is about. like how im cherishing my best friends. but lets get this clear, this isnt about praising how much i love my best friends. its about praising those who have had a huge impact on my life. we dont have to be best friends but theyve done something that has been super impactful on me. so thats why there will be some people who shock the hell out of you. haha. and to my best friends who dont make it, dont worry i have something special to write about all of you. which leads me to the next side of my block. but remember this is a friend blog. not a sponsor or family blog.

Philip Gapusan

WTH right? haha. ok so yes im not very close with this person. but this guy had a huge impact on my life. so i went on this retreat called a YFC retreat. Youth for Christ. i wasnt very into it to be honest with you. it was so much different than lifeteen. SO much...but it turned out that i would actually get a lot out of that retreat.

so my group leader was Philip and this guy named Justin. they were of course in high school and it was wierd to talk to people around your own age. but it was interesting to clash people together who wouldnt normally talk with one another and share their experinces with God. ok so Philip was in my group. and we knew each other. he was in council, used to go to lifeteen, he was filipino. it was all chill you know. and we talked. he actually let me into his life, and i learned a lot of things about him i didnt know. we had some really great talks. he made me actually think of what God was to me. even if this guy was so young and made a lot of mistakes in his life.

so the retreat ended. i was kinda bitter about it. and then i got this letter from Philip. he said that he sees me growing in God and how much potential i had. he even gave a clue as to wanting to be my sponsor. haha. i'll be honest, i wanted Philip to be my sponsor. but, i knew that Philip wasnt ready yet. it was hard for me to see someone i looked up to leave church for awhile. well at least OLPH. and then come back but still not be the same. and even if we dont talk and were not as close, Philip did make a huge impact in my life. he made me see why God was in our lives in the first place. and even if we stray away, we can still have a huge impact in the faith of others. i know Philip is on a new journey now, but i pray that hes gonna be okay, and when he comes back, frick he better say hello. haha.

Jamaica Agustin+Jeffry Campanero+Philip Gapusan+

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Six Sides of The Block-Side 2

ok so here's Side 2. so far, we Side 1 belongs to Jamaica Agustin. well side 2 may come as either a surprise to many or it might be super obvious. but here it is...

Jeffry Campanero

now this one came to me as a surprise. i think me and jeff became friends afer i got a myspace. haha. he added me right away...idk why;]. haha. kidding. but i set out to make something called an Advice Blog which soon turned into a bust after all i wrote about was Tadpole. yeah, that sucked. but my first request for advice was from no one other than Jeff. about a girl named Patricia? haha. i think that was the code name right?

well i wrote it. and he wanted more advice. so xcheffeh, toopsycho4ya, and may the AIM conversations began. it started off small. we were getting to know each other. i mean we knew each other. both of us were on council, we were both boys, and yeah. i think that was it. haha. but we soon figured out we had more in common. a lot more actually.

jeff was one of the few people i opened up too. and then after the So You Think You Can Love Retreat, he decided that i was drifting away. he wrote this blog and all of this came at a surprise to me. i mean i never wanted to hurt Jeff at all. and our friendship was never the same ever since. then, at FullFilled i finally learned that he put so much trust in me and after being so busy it seemed like i didn't care. and all i could do was finally see how much i meant to him as a friend in his eyes.

jeff's helped me through soo much that i really can't thank him. that would be like nothing, he deserves more. hes been such a great friend to everyone in his life, even if he gets little in return. nevertheless, he still remains the best friend. so seeing him graduate and leave is gonna be hard because i wont have my safety net anymore when im down. but jeff, when you leave promise me you'll be there when i get to California. haha. and don't be afraid of what the world holds next.

Jamaica Agustin+Jeffry Campanero+

Six Sides of the Block-Side 1

so hello everyone! a lot of people are doing this whole VIP BLOG stuff, so i was inspired. it got me thinking of the book the Five People You Meet In Heaven. I didn't read it, but form the title it seemed like tears kind of book. haha. so i came up with Six Sides of the Block, the 6 people who personally changed my life. and i could only choose from friends so it was hard to narrow down the 6. some of my bestfriends never even made the list. but i chose the first 3 already. but im only going to do one side everyday. for the next 10 days. haha, just in case i get lazy to do one i gave myself 4 extra days. so side one belongs to...


Jamaica. where do i start? so i got to know Jamaica my freshmen year. all i knew of her was that she was what, pretty? haha. well not really until she got bangs but whatever. haha. we really didn't get close until sophomore year when we decided that we would do broadcast together. and then the original Rymai began.

of course we aren't Rymai anymore, but we still are Ryan and Jamaica, attached to the mother fricken hip. so we got super close, and this huge snag hit our friendship. she took my Presidency. everyone knew Ryan valued his Presidency. haha. but she got it. and all i could do was sit and secretly be jealous and angry and all these emotions built up. but, we stayed close and we even got closer somehow.

over the summer we went ot SLW where we met the ever infamous Jenah(Jena)(Jenna) idk how to spell her name. but whatever. but then school came around. one day i just couldn't take the fact that she had almost everything i wanted. and it hit me and i broke down in Sensei's room. whoa, that sucked big time. i thought i hated her. but in reality i didn't. we didn't talk for like a week when she finally came up to me and we had a "Hills" moment. since then we've been FRENEMIES.

i remember this one day i gave her my Philia heart. you better still have it. it was talking about a friend that we value in life during the retreat. and out of everyone i gave it to her. it meant a lot. she keeps it in her Bible:]

mark this on May 26, 2009, Jamaica said she would date me if i fit her type. haha. but like i said me and Jamaica are attached to the hip. Side 1, belongs to Jamaica Agustin. she changed my life in more ways than one. she taught me not to take life for granted, and all the gift we had. marked me down for every type of concietedness. and she built her trust in me. and not to mentio she got me addicted to Honey Mustard Sauce. i love my island in the pacific. and were gonna be attached by the hip for another year-___-. nah nah kidding:]

Jamaica Agustin+

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Big Week

so hello:]

ok so this past week has been one of the biggest weeks of my life. it starts a whole new chapter in the Book of Lord Ryan. so first off, i am now officially the Senior Class President and National Honor Society President as of May 22, 2009. Haha, pressure switch has just turned on. Second i got Confirmed as of May 23, 2009. That means no more Monday classes and a little less of Jamaica. Wait a minute, were both teaching Confirmation 2. Darn! haha.

so yeah three things. but its still a big week. i've worked for the past 3 years to get to the Presidency and 2 years to reach Confirmation. this big week actually is leading up to the big year. i guess its time for Ryan...Lord Ryan to fly. haha.

taking over the world one block at a time. -Ryan:]

oh yeah remember 555-EASY!

Friday, May 15, 2009


so today we passed the flags...and im officially a SENIOR!!!!! but im starting to figure out im doing WAY TOO MUCH for Senior Year. Ok, so here's the list of responsibilities;
1.Senior Class President:]
2.Newswriting Editor
3.National Honor Society President
4.Saber Media
5.AP English
6.AP Psychology
7.Teaching Confirmation 2

and thats not even all of it. College, Scholarships, being sexy is all i have to add on to that list. and of course work on the conceitedness. haha:]

but it leaves the question...Am i Going to have a life? yes, senior year is meant to be the time where we just relax. hang out with friends, eat our hearts out, get fat, look at ourselves, tell everyone were getting fat, and then practically starve to get rid of the fat, but it never works. yeah thats what Senior Year should be. im kidding folks.

Senior Year, so ive heard, is the time to chill with friends and walk slowly to class. (im serious someone told me that!) but from what ive heard Senior Year is the defining moment of the twelve years of your life in school. so then i think, Why the Hell am i doing so much?

i think three years ago i said that i would get Senior President so i can speak at grad and NHS President so it looks good on me. well it came true. and i love it! but is it too much? all i have to say is that i made a choice a long time ago that i would do whatever it took to prove myself that i was the best. and this is the way i chose to do it. i know im gonna give up a lot of my life to do it, but in the end i know it'll be worth it. i turned out fine so far. i have a shit load of best friends, a supporting family, and my faith. so bring on Senior Year cuz Lord Ryan Lizardo is taking over. (damn i gotta work on that concieted thing><) -Ryan:]

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Welcome Back to Blocks

its funny. i think i sat here for days trying to figure out what i should write about. i mean my last few blogs have been filled with what i was feeling at the moment and all the decisions i made in the moment. but since ive had time to think ive reconsidered some decisions and affirmed others.

well first off my Smile Kiddo blog where i said that i hated someone. haha. i take that back. i was so angry that i was harsh about what i was saying. it made me forget about everything i learned about God is love not hate. haha, so let me say that i don't hate anyone. they hurt me real bad so i took it out on them thinking that i hated them. but in reality i was just super angry at the situation and my reaction was an immature one. but yeah, not to say that i love the person. still dislike them. haha.

second. in my Wake-Up Call blog, i said that i would leave Lifeteen for a while to figure things out. im making that decision final. i have to take time off from lifeteen. i think its necessary for me to do so. my feelings are that people aren't there for the right reasons. and who am i to talk? sometimes i forget why im really there. but there are other resons holding me back to. well i was asked to go back to one more lifenight by a special core member. other than that one night i'll be gone until further notice. but i hope everyone continues to keep the spiritual high within lifeteen without me.

thrid. fuck have i become super conceited. damn it jamaica. lol
fourth. i gave up. i had so many different choices but none seemed right. so just sitting again. frick im stubborn. maybe i shouldve listened to some friends.
fifth. Did i win NHS President?
sixth. this damn trip over the summer is making me miss all these grad parties
seventh. Daisy from Daisy of Love...i wanna date her:](LOL!)
eighth. pudgy cheeks and chinky eyes. haha.

and lastly, things are about to get a whole lot better or the blocks will crumble. -Ryan:]

Monday, May 4, 2009

Wake-Up Call

what are my true intentions in everything i do? i just got out of the car from talking to my sponsor for what seemed like an eternity. all i was talking about was nonsense. it was just a bunch of sentences and random subjects that made no sense when you put them all together. all i knew is it revolved on what i believed about my faith and church and of course God.

and yet, nothing made any sense to me. i kept talking about what stopped me from believing in God fully. the same things came out, the same problems, and nothing was resolved. i look at myself and have no idea what im doing. it's been a struggle to understand why im at church when i've seen people who were so dedicated leave in an instance. saying they don't fit in or they don't see the point. yes, there are people i question in lifeteen, but that hasn't stopped me. there are even people i don't necessarily like. but i kept saying my true intentions were God.

true intentions? i say it like i think about God every second. i make it like i do. but in all honestly i don't. Yes, i do have a good grasps on my faith, but can i honestly say im at church for God, and only God? i dont think anyone can say that. at least any teen anyway. i've learned that people find what i have to say interesting. i think every core member has pulled me aside to talk to me about my "life." haha. and everytime i learn something different. yet, it still doesn't hit me.

God is an intention in me going to church. but not the only one. it'll take awhile for me to realize that. so what do i go to church for? like mailyn says its a cliff hanger. but here's the deal. i made a decision that i might take time off from lifeteen to figure out why i was there. not to say that im not gonna come back. im still going to mass, but not necessarily lifeteen. trust me im gonna come back. but i need time. maybe after confirmation. and i think im not going to join MADE. that's something i have to really think about. yes, i did have some pretty killer ideas at the MADE meeting, but the group in itself isn't for me. but things might change. i mean i might join MADE, but i'll look into that.

i'll leave it at this. people like lindsey, esther, edison, jordan, they all left. people who were so dedicated. and even core members left. i dont want to leave. it's just i need time to really think why im there. here's a new saying "build blocks until you can't see over the top so nothing can distract you." building away. -Ryan:]

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Smile Kiddo

you know what,i love when people underestimate me because it gives me a chance to prove them wrong. ever since winning President i've had this whole thing that because im President i have to do everything perfectly. and its true. i have to make the best year for our Senior year. and i will. trust me i will. and i know i have a lot on my plate. and yes, today i officially took back the reigns. it was scary to know that people had to go to me again if anything went wrong. i relied on Jamaica a lot and i didnt even realize. but it just means i have to get used to the fact that im President again. but dont fricken expect me to be perfect right away. i mean nobody can just get back into the groove of something like that.

so yes. im stacked for next year. Senior Class President, Newswriting Editor, 2 AP Classes, College Applications, Saber Media, Teaching Confirmation 2 and not to mention make a Kick Ass speech for graduation. and guess what...I KNOW I DESERVE ALL OF IT. i worked my ass off to get where i am. and if you think i dont deserve it your just fricken jealous. so to that bitch in council who wouldnt shut their mouth whenever i tried to talk i will make sure that will never happen again. just because you lost dont mean you have to be pissed at everything im doing. and to add on to that i am going to make the newspaper better. not to say it wasnt great this year, cuz i loved this years newspaper and editors. hooray for angie, alyssa, and ron. but me and vinh are gonna make it better. but if you think we dont deserve to be editors, well i dont see you in newswriting learning layout.

so continue to doubt me, because trust me i will prove you wrong. i have so many people to support me. especially God. and marinelle is right. let me be blunt and say i worked my ass off for this and you didnt. so why should i listen to what you guys think cuz in the end guess who's in charge? so im gonna keep smiling kiddos and build my blocks. -Ryan:]

Monday, April 27, 2009

Blue's Clues

So i like the show Blue's Clues. Do they even show it anymore? Well, that's not the point. So anyway, i've learned that everyone in life is a detective. We all try to find the right clues in order to put a complicated puzzle together. and sometimes, the result isn't what we expected. If you were in my shoes you would be able to see how many mysteries i've been trying to solve. each of them having some special twist that i have to consider.

Have i missed out? i think i've over analyzed a mystery and in the end may have lost out on something that leaves me guessing, was i right all along? yes, every mystery has a twist. but sometimes the twist in a mystery could totally be your fault and you may not even know it. and in the end, if you didn't mess up, it could've been a mystery that once it was solved opened many doors of oppurtunity. but i leave the question of that one missing clue. In Blue's clues you need only 3 clues to solve a simple mystery that you know the answer to after clue #2. Not to mention how Steve never finds the clue until your yelling at the screen of how idiotic or blind he was. but we all are Steve once in awhile. totally blind to what's in front of us.

final thought(haha, i stole mai's thing) Blue's Clues needs only 3 clues and life needs many. I guess my tower was to high to see what could've been right in front of my face. -Ryan:]

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Love and Sex and Cactus

lol. i got that title from the Ciara song. anyway WELCOME BACK TO HAWAII RYAN! lol. it felt like i was gone forever. the traffic, the people, the emo, i mean i missed all of it for the 6 short days i was gone. but now im back and make my triumphant return into your lives. sorry, i like to pretend im a wrestler when i go away and return to make a huge splash. haha. im wierd like that.

so Arizona was way better than i expected. the shopping over there was fricken awesome. like the malls were huge. the people were fricken rude. like when we went to the planetorium, which was actually really cool, there was a field trip with this school. from that point on i hate elementary school kids from Arizona. they threw things at all of us. Esther and Alyssa wanted to smack them. At least Daniel pretended he had terets and scared the shit out of them. lol. oh yeah, i learned a lot at the convention too. gotta start prepping to become the new Newswriting Editor-in-Chief. oh and the JEA dance was fricken hilarious. we took pictures of all the sexual things on the dance floor. lol

that was Arizona. California was cool too. went to Disneyland for the first time and rode almost everything. i got heat exhaustion and almost collapsed. i made a kid cry because i said mickey mouse was a guy in a costume. and saw a little girl sleeping on the ground. all in fun. i think the funniest part of the trip was when Daniel prank called a McDonald's asking what to order. lol the lady told us to come look at the menu.

anyway the trip was awesome. but im back and ready to go back to school. well not school but see all the friends. haha. ok well Building Blocks is off intermission and will proceed shortly. -Ryan:]

Friday, April 17, 2009

Hello From AZ

so its homework time in Phoenix which means time to BUILD BLOCKS! lol. no, im trying to catch up on Yoneshige's homework. well, Arizona is colder than i thought, its Great for Shopping, and the rice and water suck. haha. but its cool. so i'm using Ram's laptop to write this blog and i'm scared that he knows i'm using it for this.

so the whole convention is pretty cool. except the fact that we look like the total odd balls. like its wierd being the tourists when were used to bashing on them in Hawaii. there's a lot of white people and little to no Filipino's/Asians. haha. but hopefully we can catch a few before we leave. sessions are cool. me and ron have been partners for almost everything and our whole clan keeps getting shocked by our van. it's kinda hilarious when we get out and into the car. nobody wants to touch it and in the end we get shocked anyway.

so yeah, why are you guys texting me that you miss me after one day im gone. thanks:] good to see that you guys cant live 24 hours without Lord Ryan Lizardo. haha. but yeah. i miss you guys to. well sorta. JK. so now were gonna go do more shopping and see white kids get freaky on the dance floor. stay cool and keep building blocks or whatever you guys do on your blogs. Ryan:]

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

I Jet Fast

ok so Lent is over. kinda late Ryan. lol. well yeah, so Lent is over and i feel like it's been a success. the only thing i regret is not making up with a certain teacher who could be squashed by about 12 blocks. haha. but as me and mailyn say...whatever.

So i got a 3.6 GPA for third term. i mean at least i passed trig with a C and damn was i lucky. i've met someone new. i ate at Genki sushi with more than 10 people at once. i'm about to leave to Arizona and Cali. i learned that i hated packing. you know the usual things. and Father told me in my confirmation interview that i have the Gift of Encouragement. lol. he said he felt at ease with me and that i make people feel at ease. haha.

there was only one disappointment this whole week. well actually a few. im not going Senior Prom with Jamaica. money was an issue. Prom may be at the gym next year. can you say GROSS. i left Easter Vigil early to go to a party. and i had to get over someone for the better of myself><

either way im glad im gonna be gone for 6 days. because as random and busy as i may be, i need a well deserved break from school, family, friends, and of course the emo kid. lol. well see you later. hopefully i can blog while im gone. well for now building blocks has gone under intermission. -Ryan:]

Sunday, April 5, 2009


i say im not, but i am. which sucks because i certainly dont need this right now. see 2009 has been the best year of my life so far. i won back President, got news editor, and about to go on multiple trips. not to mention me and my sponsor are totally on the same page. but, (dont you hate it when theres always a but) this year i also found a little problem. haha. a little flaw in my plan to take over the world. and this flaw is too confusing to even explain.

so yes everyone i feel as if im attached. in many different ways. i feel like im attached to my family. like they wont leave me alone! haha. its a good thing, but seriously your making it hard for me to think of the homework im not gonna do. duh! haha. im attached to my friends. who seem to have much more things going on that i didnt notice. like some friends are going to the beach, some friends are going to the movies, and some friends have psycho ex-girlfriends that wont leave them alone. Hi Char! haha. and im attached to church. like i really dont believe that without it, i would be the way i am now. i could be better though. and i met all those awesome people, except one, name starts with and S and ends with an arah. lol. and lastly im attached to...

and the wierd thing about all these attachments are that, i hate them. i'd like to think sometimes that i can survive without any of these things. one thing i said this week that makes me crack up is the whole bus comment. i should make a list of who would i throw under the bus to get ahead. a shorter list would be who i wouldnt. haha. you know im kidding people. but still this whole thing with attachments, its not gonna hold me back from what i have to do in the future. and anthony helped make me see that clearer. thanks sponsor. too bad nobody else can pick you for their sponsor without fearing me. lol. but yes im attached in four different ways. five if you count -Ryan:]

PS i know i've been making all those blog jokes about others peoples blogs, but the Reasons Why i've been doing that is... haha, esther, jordan, and jeffry. lol.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Horoscopes and Chess Boards

platonic. i have no idea what that means. but when you put it together with my horoscope it makes a hell of a lot of sense. so im reading my horoscope because its always right. and funny thing, its about the same thing i was thinking about today. haha. geminis! so bipolar. but idk, ny horoscope seems right. and i know Catholics dont believe in horoscopes, but i kinda do. Sorry God:[. but yes, i love my horoscope.

anyway enough about the Chinese. Chess. its a game of concentration and strategy. currently, i have been playing a game of chess with the people around me. some people are my sturdy pawns and others are like my horses. (what are the horses called again?) either way i love them all. but i wonder sometimes how i need to play my board in order to get things to go my way. you know, be like the Burger King Guy. but playing chess, its harder than we think. not literally, but figuratively. see, its hard to sacrifice people on a board. but to get ahead, you have to give them up. no matter how hard it may be, it gets you closer to the ultimate goal. what is the goal? thats what you have to figure out as you play. if theres one thing i learned from this past lifenight, it is that we all have a life purpose. and once its served the game is over. so live life to the fullest don't let anyone hold you back or anything. its cliche' but true. and another thing about chess, trust your army. dont think they dont care. because they do. and dont turn your back on your army either. i've learned that awhile ago. wait, did the Chinese create chess?

and with that Samichtu and Mai World has nothing on Building Blocks:P

PS My horoscope, haha, did i forget to mention what it said?

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Little Frogs

it's simple, to say things that you don't mean. or even do things you don't mean. lately, i've contemplated on how a plan can get mixed up into something that you weren't ready for. something you weren't ready for that next thing you know would be in Mai's World. like a joke that turned out would backfire on you. yeah, that's the word backfire. haha.

i was talking in the car one day with my friend. this one guy who looks exactly like a certain pudgy cheeked guy who went to my church. exactly like him, just cut your hair and meet the twins. lol. well, we were talking about past issues i used to have. things that are kinda over. keyword there is kinda. but one thing led to another and we began talking about present day life. my life as a covergirl. haha. (JK) anyway, i told him a few things and being mr. blunt he never held back anything on his mind. i love people like that...if they dont do it all the time though:]

Well, my friend was super cool about everything. and even if i know one day that this friend will be gone, for now im glad i have them. even if he looks like... WTF. haha. but one thing he did tell me was why fear the worst? or at least i got that out of that conversation anyway. cherish the people you have now. life is too short to just wait and wonder. and waiting and wondering...everyone knows i hate that:D

but why is this entitled little frogs? because, it just is. if you haven't noticed my blogs are like puzzles. you never know what it means until you get the full story. and trust me it makes sense people, it does. just put together the puzzle. too bad i don't just Spill the Bottle or teach Life Lessons or even count my days wrong on the 40 Days and 40 Nights of Lent. haha. Ryan:]

PS Dear...

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Little Boy Grow Up

I must've wrote this blog 15 times. i think i said everything right...

a boy sat on the dinner table with his mother. it was the first time in a few weeks that the boy decided to eat with her. they talked about nonsense, how he was doing in school, what time he would be leaving the next day to go to relay, you know the usual. silence comes. suddenly its broken. the mother asks why won't you stay? the boy sits and wonders what she means. she explains. why don't you stay here for college son? the boy asks if its about money. the mother says no. and then yes. the boy rolls his eyes. then the mother says that she will also cry and miss him tremendously if he decides to leave. communication she says. thats all she wanted from the boy and his sister. the boy still sat in silence without saying his thoughts. and he finishes his food gets up and goes to his room.

the next day the boy gets ready to leave for relay for life. excited he ignores every phone call until he was ready to go. the boy gets there, late, to the event he was supposed to plan, with 5 people and 1 baby behind him. he sees people and ignores them. sees people who care about him and still decides to ignore them. what was wrong with the boy. the boy has fun with his friends until 1 in the morning. he decides to take a walk with his sponsor. they go around the track for what seems like hours dicussing the boys insecurites. why was the boy scared? why does the boy want to leave? what does the boy have to prove? the boy doesn't get answers from his sponsor, but from himself. the boy didn't know how strong he was. but still the boy felt weak. he was still scared. the boys sponsor tells him he knew him more than he thought. the boy's sponsor could tell when he was down, when he was stressed, when he was feeling like the world was on his shoulders. the boy ended his walk with a simple thanks and left.

the boy decided that he would not sleep the whole night and didn't want to think. the boy went home and slept.

why is it when i feel like i have everything solved, its not. my life will never be an open book, says me. but for others they tell me its so easy to just let go. to leave behing the things that don't matter. but in life, everything matters. family, friends, sponsors, church, and even insecurities. they all matter because that's what makes you you. the only thing from that checklist we need to leave is fear. the fear to let the world know what's on your mind. the boy kept quiet in every situation. not communicating with his mom, ignoring his friends, and even giving a lack luster appreciation to the man he looks up to who knew more than he thought he did. the boys is silent, but comes off so loud. why is that? life is so confusing. the boy is still little(not in height) but in heart. he needs to grow up and let God lead him and stop trying to lead himself to prove a point. a point that may never be made. so little boy grow up. build your blocks and learn. Pray on it. -Ryan:]

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Reality Jets In

so the retreat is over and this blog comes two days late. Full-Filled, it wasn't the same as So You Think You Can Love. It was kinda disappointing. But still, this retreat brought something new to my attention, like Anthony said. My biggest fear is rejection. not burnt rice. lol. but im afraid God wouldnt accept me because i couldnt accept myself. many of you know the reason for this fear. but anothony made it clear to me that God will make the last judgement. it's crazy how forgiving God is. and i love Ikona for being able to give me the best heart to hearts i ever had. i made him cry and i cried too. lol. and then alex, always know the right thing to say. but the spiritual high...its gone. its hard to realize how fast the realworld can steal something from you. thats the sad part when it comes to retreats, losing that feeling.

but the retreat brought other stuff to my attention too. whether i like it or not, my friends are graduating and some won't come back to lifeteen or some are even leaving. reality sets in slowly. seeing my friends up there on stage with their candles, everything seemed real. that would be me next year... seeing mailyn cry right in the middle, haha, made me realize how close it is for them and how each day its getting closer for me. so to the seniors, God will always be with you no matter where you go. and don't forget to go to church and pray. graduating from high school doesnt mean your graduating from God.all this talk about people leaving, makes me not want to leave for college...but we'll see where God sends me.

lastly, your making me go crazy. i have no idea what to think about you at the moment. it's funny. how life seems to throw things at you your not ready for. God just sent one at me. my gut, its always right. why do i doubt it. will you just tell me already ease the anxiousness. i like you.

and lastly if you havent heard, im Senior Class President. (Cant get enough of that) One jar filled with blocks sit next to the tower. -Ryan:]

Monday, March 16, 2009

Wait This Isn't A Blog

So its my first video blog. It's super short so bare with me. Real Blog coming soon...

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Jet Anxiety

i noticed that i put jet in all my titles now. well anyway, this whole week has been nothing but a lot of waiting, lies, and a crap load of confusion! why is it that people lie to you to build the suspense factor. i hate that.

first off, the election is over. i hope i won. will they just tell us already? and second off, i hate that i'm still hung up over things. and with all those things i'm hung up over, it gets me in bad situations. situations i don't need to be in. situations that confuse me. it gets me so riled up and eventually i get quiet and i look like i'm about to kill someone. that's my thinking face everyone. lol.

so with that said, i'm so happy retreat is coming up. i need it. i need someone to push me so hard all this anxiety will come up in tears. lol. challenge, the first person to make me cry on the retreat will get a special prize. jk. haha. but here's the thing folks. there's so much things on my mind right now. too bad the world will never know. i build blocks, what do you build? -Ryan:]

this blog is short. lol.^^

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Jet Turbulence Gets Complicated

for three days i've managed to stay off the computer, off myspace, and off blogspot. kinda funny when i log on and was hit by all these new blogs. i only read a couple. so its a rainy day. i love rainy days because they make you think.

in many circumstances this past week has given me so much crap and a lot of achievements all at the same time. it kinda strikes me as im losing a lot of myself. why? its hard to explain. one thing i always held on to is the fact that i gotta build myself this huge tower and trying to dominate it so the spotlight is always on me. hence, ryan building blocks. lol. but doing this it makes me less of a person and more of a busybody. sometimes i need some time to sit down and think like this. rainy days are awesome.

so retreat is coming up. three days of nonstop love. or i'd like to think as three days of rebuilding. so i read mailyn's blog about losing the LIFE in LIFETEEN. she's right. we've lost a lot of it. i've lost a lot of it. i used to love going and being loud. like Alex told me monday night, i was the loudest and all of a sudden i got quiet. i have no idea how to go off of that sentence.

and then i read mixxel's blog. your brother. im glad that you feel that you found another brother figure. but, try to rebuild the one you already have. i love my sister no matter how much we fight and argue. deep down we both know we would take a bullet for one another. cherish the family you have everyone. all families argue. all families lose contact. mine does all the time. but i still love them. so mixxel call your brother, or text him. trust me on this one.

and now im listening, haha not reading, marinelle's blog. no worry i read it. before she bugs me. but in many lives turbulence will get the best of us and we will get rocky. that just leaves you to solve your problems under God. no matter how many blocks you build your tower will fall eventually. mine has. Ryan:]

before i go i have a little lent update. i dont think im giving up anything for lent. and i kinda gave up on my other things i wanted to do. but now i decided my lenten journey will be rebuilding myself in what i used to be and making it better all under the supervision of God. i will update you on that...i hope;]

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The Jet Is Wavering

false hope. those are two words that are ringing in my head over and over again. what's funny about life is that when you want something you can't always have it.

many of you have heard that I was going to retract my money for the retreat. many of you tried to convince me to not do it. well for those of you who sorry. but ive come to a decision that i will not not attend the retreat. did u get that? haha. feel free to reread that part.

well for the slow ones, i am going on the retreat. 10% is thanks to marinelle and her voice ringing in my head like every two minutes. thanks a lot marinelle. lol. 25% is thanks to anthony. uh duh. and the rest goes to alex. it was like a mini retreat talking to him. but he got me to realize something that i may, or actually is a HUGE part, of the reason why i didnt wanna go in the first place. many of which, those of you know. like my aunties wedding, and my love for the people who go to lifeteen to this day(lol), but there was something that i hid from everyone that's really been bothering me. deep down. and alex was able to dig it up just in time for me to say that i was going on the retreat.

which goes all the way back to the top of this blog. false hope. i guess i havent come to terms with some things that have been bothering me for a long time. things that this blog has metioned before and things that haven't been mentioned to the public. all i can say is there is only one promise in life and it is that God makes all the decisions in life and he is very forgiving. this tower will not crumble and jets will continue to fly. -Ryan:]

Saturday, February 28, 2009

These Walls

i notice that i dont like to open up to much people at all. what's funny is i can be the most loud and outspoken person in the room, but sometimes i can be the quietest. i hate it. but i cant really change it. i was kinda built that way. it takes a lot for me to trust someone. so yeah, thats why im not a talkbox at times. which may explain my problem with a certain something in my life. but, that is my little token for now.

speaking of tokens, i noticed that my pig is getting full of tokens but none of them as shiny as the one i had before. many of them come close. one token in particular. idk why i feel that when this one token talks to another token i get super jealous. its stupid lol. dumb token! the building blocks make no cents anymore? get it cents is like sense. lol.

and a little lent update. i have stayed true to the whole meat thing. havent cheated, yet. haha. i hope i dont slip up. i still seriously havent found what im giving up on yet. or gaining. can you say super behind? what i dont get is when people give up something ridiculous. like rice. i mean how is giving up rice gonna bring you closer to God? lol. one thing i cant give up...building blocks. Ryan:]

i dont like this blog. im gonna build a new one><
but you guys read it anyway^__^

Thursday, February 26, 2009

It's Funny

so today was the beginning of lent. it was great except for the cold weather and the loads of homework. can't wait to fail a trig test again:[ anyway it's funny how this years beginning of such a wonderful season in the church can be so different from one year ago.

one year ago i made a call to someone to pick me up. they didnt answer the first time but called me back. told me that they'll be there in a few cuz they were taking a shower. next thing you know i hopped into that silver thing and we were off. please don't stop the music was playing on the radio and we talked about the AP classes i would be taking at the point im at now. told me i was crazy and was gonna die. so far im alive and passing. lol. but got to church and told them that they left their lights on. after they turned them off, walked into church and stayed in the back while they found a seat in the front. got the ashes on my forehead and mass ended. waited for what seemed like an hour to go home with them only to be swooped up into my sponsors car instead. teased me about how i didnt ride with them and argued until i got home 2 minutes later. forgave each other and sat in my room and thought for a long time.

its funny how i remember that night to a tee. but tonight, was super different from last year. i wasnt as happy. not even close. i guess i do miss a lot of things. so what am i giving up for lent? more like what im gonna gain from it. but one things for sure, i need to give up on these memories. building blocks for 40 days and 40 nights. -Ryan:]

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Urban Dictionary

these three defininitions of my name is super funny

1. Ryan-the cutest guy ever, and has the greatest respect for girls, is funny, and very very LOVING!

2. Ryan-A name, which is commonly both a first or last name, which is very often confused with Brian. Its Irish roots define the name as "little king".

3. Ryan-A noble ganster who shoots unstabel niggers

i like the urban dictionary.
[insert block comment here] -Ryan:]

Jet Crash Enclosed

I find it cool to say the word jet now. i think its my favorite word. lol. well apart from my new jet obsession, i would like to say that ryan has now put himself in a new category. so today i let my inner beyonce out. aka diva. haha.

so i absolutely hate when people never know how to keep their comments to themselves and think that they rule the world. not to say that i dont want to rule the world, lol, but at least im not obnoxious enough to interrupt everyone if they dont believe the same thing i do. so today i decided to play that character with two people who do this shit everyday. haha. felt good to give em a piece of their own medicine. felt bad afterwards though. its not me to just do that yaknow. haha. but oh well.

today i also did something i havent done in awhile. chapel time for ryan. the best thing when your day is just tiring and stressful is to have a sit down with God and just talk. i love talking out loud in there. its so peaceful^___^

lastly i never realized how much i cared about this person, but i do. i really hope this person doesnt get hurt. i guess when people ask me who i sort of look up to now, i might have an answer. lol. oh and to answer the question on my last blog, it takes approximately 12 blocks to smash a teacher. ^__- -Ryan:]

Monday, February 16, 2009

See Spot Run?

so today was the Great Aloha Run. but before that lets backtrack. so last night was lifenight and the much anticipated,(but much questioned) landon and sarah's wedding. but the night turned out to listening to Father Alex(lol) talking about the same damn thing all over again. irked much? haha. so we ate dinner, laughed at jamaica, and had deep conversation with tiffany and rjay plus andrea. it was about inner issues. cant go deep into that one. but it'll all unfold sooner or later. ::cough:: retreat ::cough:: lol. but then had a sit down with sarah and got tough love. haha. but was worth every second.

so then got home around 10 and then watched tv. headed to bed but didnt sleep due to my over active imagination and contemplative thinking. ugh! and i had to leave the house at 3:40 AM. GREAT! so left the house met at Starbucks around 4 and rode with winnie all the way to the water station by Wendys. it was worth waking up at 4 in the morning to throw cold water at people until shaun threw his water at me><. right in my face. lol. so then after Great Aloha Run a couple of us went cruising to Zippy's, then Yogurtland, and then Jungle Fun in Ala Moana. lol. i got to drive. haha. and i never crash into anything! three claps for ryan:]

Then got home and Crashed. haha. luckily Pokemon had a marathon to wake me up. btw one question, how many blocks does it take to smash a teacher? -Ryan:]

Friday, February 13, 2009

What's The Skinny?

ive been busy! haha. kk so i am officially Junior Newswriting Editor in training. lol. i finally understand what it takes to make 20 pages of news that might end up in a trash can in two weeks. it better not though, cuz making that thing takes a lot of time, creativity, and a lot of patience(something im not very good at><) but now i like praise angeline. shes amazing at doing what she does.

well NHS hasnt been very good. plans are always changing and mistakes are always made. mostly by the Juniors. sorry. lol. but i hope we can make everything smoother. and math is killing me and a whole lot of other upperclassmen. i mean most of us are failing because its hard to say one word without hearing a sophomore ask a question. one in particular><. haha. but im making that up. now i have a C. horrible but better than an F.

then theres the election. omg. biggest election EVER. haha. running for President so please support me on March 3 by voting in room G107. tell all your friends. once again my full name is LORD RYAN LIZARDO. so please check my box. haha.

then today on Friday the 13th i got my permit. haha. long time coming. but now i can drive...well legally anyway. today i also went to Big Brothers and Big Sisters, and afterward walked around Campbell with liz reminiscing on how were all grown up. lame! lol. btw im starting to like in someone with. huh? haha. so blocks on the tower, one block falls, and finally smashes a frog. -Ryan:] (sometimes i confuse myself)

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

May The Game Begin

hey everyone so i know i havent blogged in awhile, right? lol. well heres to quench your thirst. so i'm starting to see that i can be very sneaky, observative, and deceptive. i have all these plans up my sleeve and its finally coming into action. do i obsess over this? NO. but sometimes i cant help but feel like i need to be playing a game at all times to get ahead in life. that may make no sense but whatever.

i mean these plans arent bad. not at all. some of them revolve aroud church. some of them revolve around school. and some may revolve around the craziest things. but they arent bad. see my game is to see how i can get ahead of the pack without getting too ahead of myself. currently my game has taken a whole new level. im starting to realize the people i need in life are the people in front of me. and i love them all. (haww touching moment right><)certain people care for you enough to do anything they can to help you get ahead of life. but there are some people you really cherish that try to stop your life in a way without even knowing it. do i have a friend like that? yup. we all do.

see a friend of mine plans his life three years in advance. a game i will never play. haha. but he's taught me that i have to start strategizig for the future if you know what i mean.

but what's the point here. see i try to get ahead in life with the support from the people i know want to help me in the game. and now i just need to make a choice of whether or not to get rid of the people holding me back. see as my tower grows higher my game gets a little more complicated. and now with another block on top of it lets hope that it doesnt completely topple over. -Ryan:]

PS Please subscribe to the new blog coming out soon called Building Blocks in Our World. by Ryan's Building Blocks and Mai World.

Friday, January 30, 2009


so i wrote a blog a year ago entitled "My Senior." Remember that? it was a time where i spelt "know" like "knoe." lol. so i was reading this blog and this is the one paragraph that stood out.

"April 17, 2008...haha...the last time i updated this blog was awhile ago...well my still...kinda...really...dont knoe about u anymore...theres one half of me that feels like its time to move on...but...i don't...and its stupid...i miss seeing u a lot...a can't go even 10 minutes without having one thought of u...damn...fallin hard much...but to tell u the truth i have another person in mind...but that doesnt compare to wat i have 4 to the lucky people readin this...yes...i'm still in love with a senior..."

catch my drift?-Ryan:[

Monday, January 26, 2009

No Words

No words can explain what happened at this past confirmation retreat. but one thing i do know is that im blessed. i know that God is real, the Holy Spirit is real, and Jesus is real. and i believe in Him 4ever. haha. and im so glad that i have the people in my confirmation class. this retreat wouldnt have been special without u guys.and i have the best sponsor in the whole entire universe. UNIVERSE! i guess after this retreat im so happy that i have God and OLPH in my life.

no words can explain what happened at this retreat no matter how hard we try to figure it out. all we know is God is real and every block on my tower is thanks to him. i guess this tower is getting a little too tall huh? -Ryan:]

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Shhhh!!! They're Reading!

when i first started Ryan's Building Blocks i planned it just to be an outlet for church lessons and putting it together with my life. but dude, this thing evolved. who knew this blog would become like a diary of sorts. like i wrote about tadpole, thoughts, bad days, good days, random stuff, and did i mention tadpole? lol.

but what i forgot about this thing is that its public! haha. like a friend told me today that their catch phrase was said at lifeteen showing that people read blogs that we dont even know. and it got me thinking. who is reading my blog? i mean i got my stalkers on the left hand corner of your screen, but who the hell is viewing my blog that i dont know of?

for one thing i know that a teacher read my blog. a teacher i extremely dislike>__< and so did my friends who dont have a blog but love me. lol. but through this blog a lot of people figured me out and certainly found out who tadpole was. but...this blog has helped me open up a lot more. and its about time people start unfolding this puzzle huh. so to all the people who read my blogs under or above the radar, thanks. good to know you guys love me enough to read about me and somewhat care!? haha.

so no tresspassing because the blocks are piling up. -Ryan:]

Monday, January 19, 2009


not sick anymore. hoooooorray! lol. kk anyway choices. what's funny about choices is that you made them...right? i ponder this a lot because i believe God does create a path but is it already created or is it created day by day from what you choose? but this isnt those religious blogs. no sir.

so a couple nights ago when i couldnt sleep i started thinking of this guy. at one point i used to look up to him. he was like this cool guy who seemed pretty cool and had the same interests in me... to a we went on this retreat and it so happened he was my group leader. he was like a couple years older than me so i thought it was wierd. and dude we bonded. at one point i was gonna ask him to be my sponsor. but with one snap of a finger, he changed in a way. and i changed in a way. and by choice i picked someone else to be my sponsor and always thought what happened. so i CHOSE to stop talking to him. i mean i wasnt mad it was just one of those things like you knew he was supposed to be someone to look up to like a sponsor but tured out to be the opposite.

so now i look back at that and think did i make the wrong choice? and if i did would i go back and fix it? the answer to both of those questions is no. i made that decision for a reason so why regret it. and that goes for every decision in my life. so where i am, im all chill. maybe i can get a good nights sleep now. put a block on that tower son. -Ryan:]

Friday, January 16, 2009

With One Storm Comes Two

yo. so i havent blogged in awhile, but today...i have something to blog about. first, today was the supposed storm. haha. that meant no school which was great...until i woke up. i just so happened to catch strep throat durng the night. it hurt so badddd.

so i decided why not go doctor right. wait for my mom and all of a sudden we get into an argument. something about me being lazy. oh well. so we get in the car and are off to the doctor. then other stuff happened and soon enough were in West Lock in the car just waiting. ugh! so ghetto huh. we didnt make it to the doctor and my mom and me werent talking at all. so my dad picks me up and we go home cuz im fricken tired. but that time in the car in West Lock made me think of how weak me and my family could be sometimes. luckily everything had straigtened out at home and were all one big happy family again...for now. thank God for retreat next weekend. so let the Building Blocks fall and for all of it up! -Ryan:]

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Free Genki?

hi everyone! so i havent blogged since the 1st day of 2009 so here it is to quench ur thirst.
so u know what i hate...broken promises. hate em. like whats been happening a lot lately, "i'll call u back." i mean i get it if its once or twice but frick so many times. and im not singling out anybody cuz so may people did it to me this year and last year. haha. and it just gets to me. idk y? just does. i mean one time i woke up at 7 in the morning thinking that i was going out at 8. no call back. so i ended up calling them and time changed to 11. wtf!
haha. ok so u know what i love...being treated to Genki. it makes u feel rich, when in reality ur sooo poor u cant afford a yellow plate. my sister treated me to Genki 3 times this week out of the 4 times we went. haha. so good yeah. but feels good making the person who fricken yells at u 24/7 to pay for ur food.
and if u havent heard i got a haircut. haha. its gonna grow in to this look ive wanted for awhile. so if youve seen it and hate it...just wait brah! haha. so with that Let the Blocks Fall cuz this is Ryan's Building Blocks! (Hooray for catchphrase!) -Ryan:]

Thursday, January 1, 2009

09 Gotta Pay The Fine!

haha. so its officially 2009 which means resolution, resolution, resolution. so here they are folks.

1. Go to church and lifeteen every Sunday.
2. Leave my hair down...
3. Learn how to cook more than rice and saimin. lol.
4. Play with Eeyore(my pupster) more often.
6. Get my permit and license.
7. Bring Kim to Ward Genki
8. Become Senior Class President
9. Get closer to my sponsor again.
10. Make a PSA on my own.
11. Be MADE into a wrestler.
12. Learn how to play my guitar.
13. Gain/get closer to my friends.
14. Do well on AP Exams and SAT
15. Go to the mainland.
16. Drop grudges...and make new ones. lol jk.
17. Stop spending money on food.
18. Get a job at Pacsun!
20. Emcee 09 Grad
21. Forget Tadpole...for good.

and there it is. Cant wait for 09.